A Study in how to become French

By yours truly, from The Knoxville News Sentinel.

Oh there it is – the sigh. Lips slightly pursed, outwardly turned, delicate. My seatmate at the train station turns away slightly, sips her coffee again.

That was no contented “ahhh” coffee sigh of a lazy American mouth. Two points.

The best victories in the game of spot the Frenchman are those that confirm all cultural stereotypes.

Franglais

I love Franglais. It makes me laugh my ass off.

Let me explain. I’m in a program with 161 other foreign exchange students. The majority are American or Canadian and speak English. Even the Japanese and most of the Mexican kids speak English. So you get Franglais.

So I was mange-ing this sandwiche when this guy …

My goddamn valise is a piece of merde!

So convenient, so hilarious.

La France

Tout le monde veulent veut savoir comment ça-va, alors …

France rocks. It actually feels really weird to write in English. I keep almost typing French words. Right now I’m in the living room with my new parents, Chantal and Dominique and the two cats and Mozart, the dog. I’m starting to understand more when they talk to each other. I wish everyone understood how bad I want to write everything in French! But sometimes it makes my head hurt.

Angers is a small town (250k) in the Loire valley (lots of rose wine) with a very old medieval castle and a river, la Maine.